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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27958763">You Are Loved</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/slimothy/pseuds/slimothy'>slimothy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Bill &amp; Ted (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, M/M, both their dads are shitty</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:55:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,344</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27958763</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/slimothy/pseuds/slimothy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Vignettes of Bill and Ted throughout the years relating to their relationship with their dads and each other.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ted "Theodore" Logan/Bill S. Preston Esq.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>106</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wanted to write a fic that delves deeper into Bill and Ted's relationships with their parents, so here it is! Hopefully the time for me to update chapters isn't too long🤞</p>
<p>Theme: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pte3Jg-2Ax4">Thirteen - Big Star</a></p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bill met Ted in the sixth grade, his first and only best friend, and with their destiny of meeting each other finally being fulfilled, there also came the realization to Bill that not everyone was given the same freedom at home that he was. </p>
<p>It never really occurred to Bill before that other kids had different rules at home. His mom left when he was too young to remember, and his dad was nowhere near prepared to be a single parent. He tried disciplining Bill, forcing him to do his schoolwork, eat his vegetables, and go to bed early. But Bill had never been a good listener, and by the time he hit the fourth grade his dad had mostly stopped caring and started letting Bill do whatever he wanted. He didn’t outright abandon him, but they were certainly distant, and once Bill figured out how to make his own food, he and his dad would go days, sometimes weeks, without talking. Bill just assumed that’s how most families were. You had to take care of yourself, that was just part of being a kid. </p>
<p>He thought Ted was the same until they had their first sleepover. </p>
<p>Before Ted could come over for a night, his dad wanted to meet Bill and his father, so they all went out to dinner together at some fancy restaurant that Bill couldn’t pronounce the name of even after Ted repeated it to him about a hundred times over. It had been his first time eating a dinner that wasn’t meant to be consumed on a tray in front of a television. </p>
<p>He wasn’t paying attention to the conversation his dad was having. Instead, he spent the whole dinner talking to Ted, who was being unusually quiet the whole time.</p>
<p>It was only after dinner when they all stood up out of their booth, that Bill realized just how intimidating Ted’s dad was. If he had to guess at the time, Bill would have thought he was ten feet tall. He had a cold stare that seemed to scrutinize everything you did, and Bill immediately got a feeling that he did something wrong when his gaze landed on him. If he had bothered to pay attention to Captain Logan at all before now, he probably would have been quiet throughout dinner too. </p>
<p>Before leaving in their separate cars, Ted’s dad gave his ok for a sleepover. </p>
<p>When Ted came over on the weekend, Bill spent most of the day showing him his music collection. They spent a good few hours listening to music before heading to Circle K to pick up snacks and slushies. </p>
<p>It was around eleven p.m. when Bill’s dad came home from wherever he went a few hours before. The two were curled up under a blanket on the floor in front of the t.v. and on their fifth bag of chips. Ted suddenly froze with his knees curled up to his chest, pulling the blanket so it covered more of his face. “Dude,” he whispered. “We’re totally gonna get in trouble.”</p>
<p>“No way, dude,” Bill whispered back but Ted didn’t respond.  </p>
<p>Bill’s dad walked in to peek at what they were watching before mumbling a goodnight and going to his bedroom. </p>
<p>Bill said goodnight back and turned to Ted, who was giving a death stare at the show, arms wrapped around his knees. He nudged him. “Hey, dude. It’s fine.” </p>
<p>Ted finally relaxed. “Your dad totally wasn’t mad. Mine would have freaked.” </p>
<p>“Bogus,” Bill said. “T.V. should be enjoyed at any hour of the day.” </p>
<p>Ted shrugged. “Yeah, but my dad totally doesn’t think so.” </p>
<p>Bill didn’t say anything after that. He only nodded and kept watching the movie, although it only became fuzzy background noise as he kept sneaking glances at Ted, his face brightened from the glow of the t.v. He felt a curiosity grow about Ted’s life and every little thing about him. Bill let it be, however. </p>
<p>They were going to be best friends forever, Bill had all the time in the world to truly get to know Ted.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>second chapter is here! I was actually tempted to post it a few days ago but I'm glad I didn't because I sat down and edited it today, and I'm much happier with this version! and thanks for the kudos and comments so far</p>
<p>Theme for this chapter: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GL7yAwfZRH4">Rock 'n' Roll With Me - David Bowie</a></p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was Bill’s 13th birthday, and he sat by the door eagerly waiting for Ted’s arrival, listening to a tape in the walkman his dad gave him that morning. He never had a friend over for his party before, usually his dad just invited a few close family members over for cake and gifts. His aunt was the only one to show up so far and was sharing a beer with his dad in the kitchen. He didn't know if more people were invited or if she was the only one. He didn't really care either way, Ted was much more fun to hang out with than anyone in his family. They always asked him the same questions (<em>How's your special day? School going well? Any girls you like?</em>) and then told him to 'go have fun', which meant the conversation was over and it was time for him to eat cake and watch t.v.</p>
<p>But this year would be better because he had Ted. </p>
<p>Picking at the shag carpet, he went over his plans for the day in his head. It so far only consisted of listening to music with Ted, but he wanted to squeeze in time to run to the Circle K. Oh, and he wanted to spend some of his birthday money on something for Ted, he’d have to remember to grill him about what he’s been wanting recently. </p>
<p>There was a soft knock on the door and Bill leaped up, pulling the headphones down around his neck, to open the door. </p>
<p>Ted gave a toothy grin at the sight of Bill and handed him a small gift in blue wrapping paper that had a note taped on the top. “Happy birthday, dude!” </p>
<p>"Woah, thanks, dude!" Bill grabbed the present and stepped aside to let Ted in. </p>
<p>"Was that Ted?" Bill's dad called without leaving the kitchen. </p>
<p>"Yeah!" </p>
<p>"Hi, Ted!" </p>
<p>"Hi, Mr. Preston!" Ted yelled. </p>
<p>Bill's aunt poked her head out to look at them. "Oh, so <em>your</em> Ted. I've been hearing about you all day." Bill blushed as he remembered how he told her about how excited he was for his 'best friend and most excellent guy in the universe' to come over. His dad chuckled. "Nice to finally meet you." </p>
<p>Ted smiled. "Nice to meet you too, Ms. Preston." </p>
<p>They headed to Bill's room and Ted teased him on the way. "All day, dude?" </p>
<p>"Shut up, Ted," he said while looking back at his friend with a grin to let him know he was just kidding. </p>
<p>Ted closed the door behind them as Bill sat down on his bed, taking off the card first. Ted's messy handwriting spelled out, "Hope you have a most excellent birthday, duder!" on the inside. Bill looked up to see Ted bouncing on his feet and his chest flooded with happiness. </p>
<p>Bill went back to the present and ripped the wrapping paper open to find a mixtape that had <em>Bill</em> and a smiley face drawn on with a sharpie. Butterflies fluttered in his chest as he held the cassette.</p>
<p>“It’s songs that remind me of you, dude,” it was Ted's turn to blush, his face turning red. "I actually made it for myself a while ago, but. . . well it's yours now, dude!" </p>
<p>Bill looked up at Ted with probably the biggest smile he'd ever had in his life. "Dude, we totally gotta listen to it!" </p>
<p>He jumped over to his boombox, putting the cassette in and turning up the volume. </p>
<p>It opened with Bowie's <em>Rock 'n' Roll With Me</em> and Bill let it play for a few seconds before turning to Ted. He was standing stiff, looking at Bill to see if he liked it. </p>
<p>Bill started singing along, and Ted immediately joined, his anxiety dissipating away into the music. They went along with every song as if they were the musicians themselves. </p>
<p>It was moments like this where Bill forgot the rest of the world existed. Right now it was only him, Ted, and the music pouring out of his boombox. </p>
<p>But it was even better this time, better than all the other times that they rocked out, because the music was theirs. Ted put it all together for both of them, and not anybody else. </p>
<p>Bill thought about his own mixtape, the one with almost all the same songs, the one sitting in his box meant for only his most important tapes. </p>
<p>The one labeled <em>Ted</em>.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Theme: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GK4mPn2RaM">Fuck Em Only We Know - Banks</a></p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was inevitable that Captain Logan would find Ted’s mixtapes. </p>
<p>He had eight. The first was one that consisted of his mom’s favorite songs. He made it a few years after she died and he played it often, usually when he missed her a whole lot or he was down and needed comfort. Five of the mixtapes were simply his favorite songs from his favorite bands. </p>
<p>The last two were mixtapes he made with Bill in mind, not counting the first one he made in sixth grade within the first week of meeting him. That was the one he gave Bill for his birthday last year. </p>
<p>The second Bill tape, labeled <em>Bill</em> with a heart to dot the i, was made because he found a whole bunch of new songs he wanted to add, so he made an updated version. It was soon his favorite cassette. He had it on constantly, sometimes hiding out in the garage in an attempt to listen uninterrupted. He always thought about Bill when it was on. Whether it be the way he showed his teeth when he smiled or how his curls bounced when he danced. His mind eventually wandered away from all the stuff he had observed about his friend, and he found himself thinking about Bill in scenarios that haven’t happened. Scenarios such as what he would look like playing a guitar (he’d sound like Eddie Van Halen, only better) or singing in a stadium full of cheering fans (Ted would be right next to him, closer than anybody else). </p>
<p>One of those scenarios was imagining what would happen if Bill kissed him. He felt a little weird when that particular thought first popped into his head. Bill was his friend and a <em>guy</em>, he shouldn’t be thinking about what his lips would feel like on his, what his hand would feel like on the back of his neck, what his hand would feel like holding his. That was <em>wrong</em>. </p>
<p>But he just liked the thought of being with Bill too much, and thinking about it wasn’t hurting anyone, so soon most of his daydreams consisted of Bill being the most resplendent boyfriend that anyone could ever ask for. </p>
<p>Then he realized it was time for a third mixtape. </p>
<p>The third one was called <em>Bill</em> with little hearts surrounding his name and it was hundred percent love songs. As was the second one, but he didn’t think of them as love songs when he made it. They were just Bill songs. So it was different. But the third one had the best songs from both previous cassettes plus a few new ones, and it resulted in a most harmonious mixtape that was totally worthy of the best dude in the universe. </p>
<p>And, as much as he wanted to run around and force people to listen to his tape so they could all understand how truly outstanding Bill was, Ted had to keep it a secret. </p>
<p>He didn’t fret over his sexuality, Bill made him happy and that’s all that mattered to him, but he knew his dad would never understand, and he didn’t know what he would do if he was banned from hanging out with Bill. Even though he would get in trouble over and over again just to see him, it wasn’t an ideal situation.</p>
<p>Ted always kept his tapes hidden away in his underwear drawer, even before his Bill mixtapes, and he didn’t know why he did at first. He just always had a feeling that if Captain Logan found them it wouldn’t be good, even if they were relatively innocent. Now the hiding space truly served a purpose of keeping away something he never wanted in his dad’s hands. </p>
<p>But no matter how careful he was, Captain Logan had a way to dig in and ruin things. </p>
<p>Ted left Bill’s in a jovial state. They had each drunk their own slushies then shared a third, and he felt like he was on one of the clouds that littered the pink San Dimas sky, his third Bill mixtape blasting into his ears. The sun was halfway down the horizon as he half-skipped, half-walked home, savoring the last bits of the sugary red syrup that still lingered in his mouth. </p>
<p>Then he turned the corner to see his dad’s car in the driveway. </p>
<p>
  <em>Shit.</em>
</p>
<p>Ted turned his music off, feeling his emotional high start to sink to the bottom of his stomach and dissolve in the acid. He checked his watch. His dad was home two hours early. </p>
<p>At least it wasn’t entirely his fault this was happening. </p>
<p>He entered the house to find Deacon sitting in front of the t.v. playing on his Atari. “Where’s dad?” Ted whispered to him, receiving a small shrug in response. </p>
<p>Deacon had always been treated better than Ted. He didn’t really care, it wasn’t Deacon’s fault. But he did wonder what he did wrong that made Captain Logan dislike him. He spent years desperately trying to be better. He drew pictures for his dad and would proudly tell him that he got at least <em>one</em> word right on the vocab test. But no matter what he did, Captain Logan told him to try harder, and then continued to let Deacon spit out his vegetables and draw on the walls. </p>
<p>He went to his room, hoping he wouldn’t get in trouble for hanging out without asking. He did it pretty much everyday, he’d just never been caught before. If he had the best luck in the world right now, his dad wouldn’t have even noticed he was gone. </p>
<p>His door was open, not a good sign since he left it closed, but maybe Deacon had been snooping. For once he hoped so. Sometimes his dad searched through his room with no prior warning, especially if Ted wasn’t home to protest. </p>
<p>Ted looked around to see if anything was different, but it was all the same as how he left it. He opened his underwear drawer to put his walkman back and felt his whole body go cold. </p>
<p>His mixtapes were gone. </p>
<p>He frantically searched through his drawer, really hoping Deacon took them as a joke. His brother was young, nine, but he understood that the things Ted kept hidden were hidden for a reason and shouldn’t be shown to their dad. The most he would do is tease him for his crush on Bill and move on by the end of the week. </p>
<p>“Ted!” </p>
<p>He swallowed as his dad called for him, voice loud but calm. He shut the drawer with shaking hands.</p>
<p>Before leaving his room, Ted shoved his walkman under his bed in hopes that his dad wasn’t planning a full search of his room. He was at least a little lucky that he decided to listen to his third Bill today, although it wasn’t like it had any competition. The cassette had been sitting in Ted’s walkman for nearly three weeks straight. </p>
<p>His dad was in the living room, and Deacon’s game was paused as his brother had been moved to the kitchen table to wait out whatever talking to Ted was going to get. </p>
<p>Captain Logan held out six tapes, allowing Ted to take them back. It was all of them except for his second Bill mixtape. He couldn’t let himself be happy that he at least got most of them back, the absence of the last one was gaping. </p>
<p>“I don’t understand the music you listen to, Ted,” he started with that disgusted tone, the one that said <em>don’t worry, you’re still a disappointment</em>. “But I’ll let you have these as they seem mostly harmless. The other one is staying with me, and I hope you can understand why. Is that clear?” </p>
<p>He stared at the cassettes in his hand, wishing he could be sucked into the tape and live in a world where music played 24/7 and there was nothing to worry about. “Yes, sir.” </p>
<p>“You’re also grounded for a week. I don’t know where you think you’re going to go frolicking around with that friend of yours instead of doing hard work, but I’ll tell you right now that it’s nowhere good. When you come down for dinner in three hours, I want to see at least some of your homework done, got it?”</p>
<p>“Yes, sir,” Ted nodded and sulked back to his room when Captain Logan waved a hand at him to leave, and he debated on whether to actually listen and take another shot at his homework or if he should nap. </p>
<p>He ended up doing neither, putting the cassettes on the top of his drawer and flopping onto his bed to stare at the ceiling while holding in tears. He was never going to see his second Bill tape again. </p>
<p>Captain Logan liked to ‘hold onto’ the things he took, and Ted never saw confiscated items after they were taken. He didn’t know if his dad kept them in his room or brought them to a dump, but that didn’t really matter. What did matter was that it was gone forever. </p>
<p>He knew the mixtape beginning to end, he knew all the songs by heart, and he didn’t necessarily need it to let his imagination run wild with thoughts of Bill, but so <em>what</em>? It was <em>his</em> and he really loved it and now it was <em>gone</em>. Ted pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes, wondering if things would get worse if he skipped dinner. He played with the thought even though he knew he would be sitting himself down at the dinner table in just a few hours. </p>
<p>In his imagination, he grabbed his walkman and ran to Bill’s, who let him in with a big hug. Then they would eat a whole tub of ice cream while watching Star Trek and, because it was all a fantasy, Bill would hold him tight the whole night through. </p>
<p>He was brought out of his head by a knock on his door, and Deacon slipped into Ted’s room, closing the door quietly behind him. “Dad can suck sometimes,” was all he said after Ted kept silent. He nodded. </p>
<p>Deacon shuffled on his feet. “What was on the cassette he kept?” he asked a little shyly. </p>
<p>Ted sat up. “It was just. . .” he was a little hesitant to answer, still instinctually wanting it to be a secret. “Songs that made me think of Bill.” </p>
<p>"Oh," Deacon kept his eyes narrowed. "What’s so bad about that?" </p>
<p>“Dad didn’t like it because all the songs were love songs.” </p>
<p>A teasing smile rose on Deacon’s face. “Do you <em>like like</em> Bill?” </p>
<p>Ted laughed a little. “Uh, yeah, I do.” It was weird to say it aloud, but it felt good. </p>
<p>“Ted’s got a crush, Ted’s got a crush!” Deacon sang as Ted’s face went red. </p>
<p>He didn’t mind the teasing but he did have to make sure he didn’t go around telling people. “Hey, Deacon, just don’t tell anyone else, okay?” Ted said. “It’s. . . different when a guy likes another guy.” </p>
<p>He pretended to lock his mouth shut and throw away the key. Ted gave him a smile as a thanks and Deacon left to go back to his game. He really was the best little brother Ted could have asked for. </p>
<p>Ted grabbed his walkman out from where he hastily stashed it and played his third, now only, Bill tape from the beginning. </p>
<p>At least Captain Logan could never take Bill away from Ted. The world would end if that were to happen.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I've been appreciating the kudos and comments so far :3 I'm glad to know people have been enjoying the story. Only two chapters left !</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bill and Missy were sitting at the kitchen table playing Candyland. They usually played a board game after dinner while tuning their ears into whatever his dad decided to watch in the living room. Tonight it was a World War II documentary, a common choice, and Bill didn’t pay much attention to it. </p>
<p>At first, Bill didn’t like that his dad married Missy. It was weird that they were so close in age and he felt gross for thinking she was hot. But he liked seeing his dad happy, and after a few days of Missy living with them, he realized he also liked having her around. She made actual dinners and cleaned up the house. Plus she was fun to hang out with and checked in with Bill about stuff his dad never did, like how his day was and if he got his work done. </p>
<p>“So what did you do with Ted today?” Missy asked as Bill moved his piece three spaces forward. </p>
<p>“We just listened to music and wrote some lyrics for Wyld Stallyns.” </p>
<p>“That sounds fun,” she moved her piece two spaces ahead of Bill’s and he frowned when the card he drew had him moving backward. </p>
<p>“It was!” He wished he was with Ted right now. It seemed like he could spend forever with him and it still wouldn't be enough. “Hey, Missy? Uh, I mean mom. Can I invite Ted over for dinner sometime? We could all play board games together!” It would be the first time Ted had dinner over at Bill’s. It would actually be the first time they would have the other over for dinner at all, Bill never wanting to spend a whole meal near Captain Logan at Ted's house.</p>
<p>“Of course you can,” Missy moved forward again, making her over halfway to the castle. “You guys are juniors, right?” </p>
<p>“Uh. . .” </p>
<p>“Eleventh grade.” </p>
<p>“Oh! Yeah!” Bill was now ahead of Missy again, but only by one space. He was making a mental list of the games he wanted to play when Ted came over. Candyland and Battleship for sure; he would have to check if he had Life. </p>
<p>“Are you guys going to prom?”</p>
<p>The question snapped Bill out of his board game-planning entirely. “Uh, well, we don’t have dates.” The thought of Ted wearing a suit made his chest go all fuzzy and Bill shook the image away. He didn’t understand the feeling he got when he thought about Ted, so he tried not to linger on it. </p>
<p>“You could go together by yourselves,” Missy passed Bill again on the board, but he didn’t really care now. The suggestion flooded Bill’s brain of him and Ted dancing together to a slow rock song, and he could feel the tips of his ears going red. “Bill?” </p>
<p>He shook his head, attempting to get rid of the increasingly romantic thoughts about Ted. He didn’t know why he got those, but they were starting to become more frequent and harder to ignore. “What?” </p>
<p>“It’s your turn to draw,” Missy tilted her head slightly at him.</p>
<p>“Oh, right,” he drew and moved himself four spaces forward. “Has anyone made you feel weird?” Maybe Missy would understand and could tell him what was going on with him. </p>
<p>“What do you mean?” </p>
<p>“Well, like, Ted makes me feel weird.” </p>
<p>“He does?” </p>
<p>“Not in a bad way!” <em>Never</em> in a bad way. Always in a really good way that made him feel confused about why Ted made him feel that way. “I just mean that I want to be with him all the time, and when I’m not my chest aches? And sometimes we hug and I never want to let go.” </p>
<p>Missy grew a huge smile. They were absentmindedly playing at this point, drawing cards and moving without really paying much attention to what they were doing. “Bill, I think you have a crush.” </p>
<p>That didn’t make any sense. Ted was his friend, just his friend, and he never looked at guys that way before. Having a crush meant thinking about them all the time and wanting to be close and. . . he had a crush. Bill most definitely had a crush on his best friend Ted, and he only just figured it out now after nearly six years. “But Ted’s a dude!” He hadn’t even realized he <em>liked</em> dudes. He was never interested in babes, but he assumed that was something that happened later. A switch that just hadn't turned on yet. </p>
<p>“There’s nothing wrong with liking men, Bill,” Missy rested her hand on Bill’s and he appreciated her support, although he was distracted with both his sexuality and affection for Ted slapping him in the face during a game of Candyland. </p>
<p>All the pieces came together in a puzzle he didn't even know he was solving. All that stuff Ted made him feel was because he loved him, and Ted was a guy, so that made Bill what? Gay? "Missy, am I gay?" </p>
<p>"That's something you have to figure out for yourself," she gave him a sympathetic smile and rubbed her thumb over the back of Bill's hand. "But I'm here for you a hundred percent, no matter what." </p>
<p>Bill squirmed in his seat and slipped his hand out from under Missy’s to draw a card, moving his piece without even being sure he put it in the right spot. It was all still a lot for him, but the initial shock was wearing down thanks to Missy. He was happy she was there, and he could come to her in the future if he needed help. "Do you think I should tell Ted?" </p>
<p>"If you want to." </p>
<p>Bill wanted to. He told Ted everything, and he wanted to spill out his whole conversation with Missy and how he’s been in love with him for years and not even realized it. He wanted to joke about it and then have everything be just the way it always had been, except they got to cuddle and kiss and go on dates - which were all things he didn't even know he wanted until now. </p>
<p>But Bill was scared. This was all new and he wanted to figure himself out. "I think I'll wait." </p>
<p>"And that's perfectly okay, Bill," she gave him a smile and he returned it. Missy drew a card and clapped, moving her piece to the end. “I won!” </p>
<p>"Congrats, Miss - I mean mom," Bill said. He helped her put the game away and left to go to his room. </p>
<p>He passed by the living room and stopped. His dad was still watching his documentary and sipping a beer. They had gotten a little closer since Missy moved in, sometimes they watched a movie together and they had an ongoing debate on whether the '60s or the '70s was the better era for rock. </p>
<p>"Hey, dad," Bill walked in, hovering a few feet away from the couch. </p>
<p>"Hey, son," his dad didn't look away from the t.v.</p>
<p>"Uhm, I have something I want to tell you," Bill didn't exactly plan on telling his dad, but it just felt right at the moment. Besides, maybe if he told his dad it would be easier to tell Ted. </p>
<p>His dad did turn at that. </p>
<p>"I'm, uh, I have a crush on Ted," he left out the part of maybe being gay. That wasn't as important to him right now. </p>
<p>“Bill, I’ve known that since you were in eighth grade.” </p>
<p>“Huh?” Bill raised an eyebrow. He expected at least mild surprise, but he <em>knew</em>? </p>
<p>“You cried when he was visiting family and you couldn’t see him for a week, and then there was the time a girl asked him out and you couldn’t let it go for days afterward even though he rejected her.” </p>
<p>Bill stared open-mouthed at him, at a loss for words.  </p>
<p>"Bill, I don't care about who you like, just so long that you're happy. I'm glad you figured it out."  </p>
<p>The shock that his dad already knew wore off quickly and Bill gave a small smile as his dad turned back to his film. He felt a little lighter, now that he knew his dad was fine with it, and that he said it aloud officially to another person. He had a crush on Ted, and that was <em>fine</em>. All those thoughts he had were <em>normal</em>, not something to be worried about. </p>
<p>He turned to walk away when his dad stopped him. "Bill, wait," he looked back. "I'm sorry I haven't really been there and I know I haven't been the best parent. For what it's worth, I really like the young man you've become."  </p>
<p>Bill grinned and leaped into a hug, wrapping his arms around his dad in a tight squeeze, who returned with a few pats on the back. "Thanks, dad," Bill let go and made his way to his room. </p>
<p>"Ted likes you back, you know," his dad said as Bill stepped out. </p>
<p>Bill felt his chest start with the fuzzy feeling again at his dad's words, and he let himself feed into this time, knowing that it was all okay. One day he would be with Ted, and they would have the best band in the world. He skipped up the stairs to his room, thinking of all the love songs they could write together. </p>
<p>He didn't know when he would tell Ted, but he didn't have to worry about that right now. </p>
<p>Bill was flipping through his cassettes, looking for the one Ted gave him for his birthday, when Missy popped her head in.  "Goodnight, Bill." </p>
<p>"Goodnight," he found the one he was looking for and put it in his walkman. </p>
<p>"I can't wait for Ted to come over for dinner," Missy said.</p>
<p>"Me neither!" Bill gave her one last smile before she closed his door and left. </p>
<p>He threw himself down on his bed and snuggled into his pillow. A crush. So that's what that was. </p>
<p>Going to prom with Ted didn't seem like such a bad idea.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I wrote like five different versions of this chapter before finally being happy with it lmao</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bill and Ted were sitting together on Bill’s bed after spending the entire day with each other. Bill was holding a comic while Ted flipped the pages, hovering over Bill’s shoulder. </p>
<p>After figuring out that what he had was a crush, Bill’s feelings only grew and became worse. He was suddenly hyper-aware of how Ted made him feel, and even small stuff like reading a comic together was no longer so simple. His mind was preoccupied with how he wanted to put his arm around him, or play with his hair, or even for Ted to rest his head on his shoulder. </p>
<p>Bill wanted to tell Ted, but the words always got caught in his throat, so he never did. </p>
<p>The day had almost been painful, and it only wasn’t because Ted was one of the most bodacious guys out there to spend time with. Bill estimated that he had almost spilled all his feelings out at least a million times.  </p>
<p>He was always thinking about what his dad said that night, that Ted liked him back, trying to hype himself up to officially ask Ted out. But he couldn’t help the anxiety that worried around the edges of his brain, so Bill remained stagnant, stuck in a cycle of telling himself he’ll finally do it, only to retreat and then smile at Ted in a hopefully not weird way. </p>
<p>Being just friends with Ted forever was both the best and worst thing Bill could think of. To have him <em>right there</em> but never in the way he wanted. The way he felt he needed.</p>
<p>A tap on his shoulder. “Hey, dude, are you okay?”  </p>
<p>Bill shook himself out of his thoughts and he turned towards Ted, who was looking at him with those brown eyes that always reminded Bill of melted chocolate. </p>
<p>His head went <em>NOW! TELL HIM NOW!</em> but the rest of his body seemed to be in disagreement; his heart pounded, hands were sweaty, throat suddenly became too dry. "I'm fine, dude," Bill choked out. </p>
<p>Bill wished Ted could read his mind. </p>
<p>He practically could, though. Ted tilted his head, knowing something was wrong with Bill because he knew him better than everyone else, knew all the ways he showed his emotions subconsciously. "Bill, my most excellent colleague, you are a heinously bad liar." </p>
<p>That was true. </p>
<p>Ted looked away, letting his hair hide him. "You've been acting weird for a while, especially today." </p>
<p>Bill's heart cracked a little. He hadn't really thought that Ted might be thinking that he didn't like him.  </p>
<p>"If I did something-" </p>
<p>"No, Ted!" Bill threw the comic on his floor and grabbed Ted's face in his hands so he could face him. </p>
<p>Bill hadn't even realized he did it until he was staring back into those chocolate eyes, now looking at him with something that, for the first time, Bill couldn't fully decipher. </p>
<p>He held Ted's cheeks, which were turning red and getting warmer, and Bill knew this was the part where he was supposed to blurt out <em>I love you</em>. Maybe with a little speech about how Ted was the best person ever and could never do anything to hurt Bill. </p>
<p>But he still couldn't get the words out. </p>
<p>Bill let go to curl up on himself, holding his knees to his chest.  </p>
<p>"Dude, what's wrong?" Ted reached an arm around Bill's shoulders, letting him rest his head on his chest. </p>
<p>Bill held in his tears, focusing on Ted's beating heart. </p>
<p>Maybe he didn't have to tell him right away. He could start with something else. </p>
<p>"Ted, I'm gay," Bill could hear Ted's heart start to beat a little faster. He couldn't wait for Ted to say something, he felt like if he paused he wouldn't be able to get it all out. Now or never. He pulled back from Ted's chest then, but not out of his grip. He couldn't let himself say it without looking at him, even if that made it harder. “And I like you.” </p>
<p>Ted blinked. “I like you too, Bill.” </p>
<p>“No, I mean I like you.” </p>
<p>"Oh!" Ted said. Then he laughed. Really hard. "I like you, too." </p>
<p>“You do?” It shouldn’t have been a surprise to Bill, and yet he couldn’t believe what he heard. This meant he could do everything he’d been wanting to. He could cuddle Ted, bring him on dates, win toys at the arcade not for his friend but for his <em>boyfriend</em>. </p>
<p>Bill was going to spend the rest of his life making Ted happy. </p>
<p>“Well, yeah,” Ted scratched the back of his neck. “I have for a while. I don’t know if I’m gay or something else, but I always liked you, Bill." </p>
<p><em>Always</em>. </p>
<p>"Can I kiss you?"</p>
<p>Ted looked at him as a wide smile grew on his face. "Yeah! Totally!" </p>
<p>"Alright!" Bill leaned in and felt his heart swell as he brought his lips to Ted's. It was everything Bill wanted for so long, except it was even better than he could have ever imagined. </p>
<p>They pulled apart from each other. "Dude, that was totally excellent," Ted said. </p>
<p>"Definitely, dude," Bill slid his hand around the back of Ted's neck and leaned in again. </p>
<p>Ted pulled away after their second kiss.  </p>
<p>Bill wished every kiss was never-ending, but he liked the part afterward where he got to look at Ted's face and admire every little part of him. </p>
<p>"Bill?" </p>
<p>"Yeah?" </p>
<p>"I love you." </p>
<p>"I love you too, Ted." </p>
<p><em>Oh</em>. That wasn't so hard. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bill woke up with arms still wrapped around Ted and squinted at the clock. 7:42 AM. He didn't want to get up yet, but eight was breakfast time and he could smell the sausage and eggs. </p>
<p>"Ted, dude," Bill shook his boyfriend awake. "Missy is totally making breakfast." </p>
<p>"I can already tell from the smell that it's gonna be a most delicious meal," Ted said sleepily, eyes not fully open as he sat up. </p>
<p>They walked into the kitchen, yawning simultaneously. Missy said a good morning while Bill's dad sipped coffee at the table. </p>
<p>"Morning, Missy - I mean mom," Bill poured orange juice into two cups for him and Ted. </p>
<p>They sat down and Bill scooted his chair closer to Ted's. </p>
<p>He would tell his parents later about him and Ted, right now he just wanted to enjoy the moment for what it was. </p>
<p>They probably knew already with the way Bill couldn't take his eyes off of Ted and the way he looked at him back. </p>
<p>Like they were the only two people in the world.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ted was half-awake, listening to Bill gently strum his guitar next to him in bed. </p>
<p>“Happy Father’s Day, dads!” Billie and Thea busted into the bedroom with a tray of food. Ted shot up, eyes snapping open with the sudden, very welcome, appearance.  </p>
<p>Bill put the guitar down while Ted rubbed his eyes as their kids put the tray on the bed. </p>
<p>“We made you breakfast!” Billie said, hugging Ted.</p>
<p>Thea wrapped her arms around Bill’s neck. “Whatever isn’t burnt, I made.” </p>
<p>“And whatever is burnt, I made!” Billie wiggled their way behind Ted, climbing over the pillows so they could sit in the middle and Thea followed suit. Billie picked up a perfectly cooked piece of bacon and bit into it. “Might I say, Thea, that you have been making stellar use of your cooking elective class.” </p>
<p>Ted grabbed his own piece of bacon and nodded in agreement. Thea used to be just as bad a cook as her fathers, but she had gotten much better since she started high school. It was also the only class she was passing, but neither Ted nor Bill cared about that.  </p>
<p>“Aw, thank you, guys,” Bill said as he dug into his pancakes. </p>
<p>The food was actually really good, and Ted had pride glowing in his chest for his kids. They always surprised him in the best ways possible. </p>
<p>When they were all done eating, Billie and Thea gave their dads hugs and carried the tray back out. "Don't worry, dads! We'll totally do the dishes!" Thea said. </p>
<p>"Dude, we should have used paper plates," Ted could hear Billie whisper to Thea once they were out the door. </p>
<p>Ted chuckled and Bill wrapped his arms around him, giving him a few kisses on the neck and nuzzled his face into the crook of his neck. "Morning, babe," he said as Ted ran a hand through his curls. </p>
<p>Ted tilted Bill's head up and gave him a kiss. It had been a near twenty years but every kiss still felt absolutely magnificent, resplendent, excellent, and every other positive adjective Ted could think of. </p>
<p>There was a crash from the kitchen and Bill and Ted stiffened. "Oh, dude, they definitely broke something," Bill said and Ted snickered. They waited for a few seconds, listening if Billie and Thea would call for them, and when they didn't they continued their cuddle. </p>
<p>"We should go to my dad's today," Bill said in between kisses. "Just for an hour or two."</p>
<p>Bill's dad had gone pretty reclusive after his divorce with Missy, and Ted knew it affected Bill at first. Finally building a relationship with his dad only to have the wall rebuilt between them after a few years. But it wasn't horrible, they still hung out every now and then. Plus he did teach them a little about taking care of Billie and Thea, like how to change a diaper. He also kept all of Bill's stuff from childhood, so they didn't have to buy much when it came to toys and clothes when the kids were growing up. </p>
<p>Ted nodded in agreement. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"What up, gramps!" Billie and Thea each gave their grandpa a high five as they entered his house. </p>
<p>"Grandkids!" Bill's dad gave each of them a fifty and let them make themselves at home. </p>
<p>"How've you been, dad?" Bill shuffled in with Ted. </p>
<p>Ted lingered while Bill and his dad talked. Billie and Thea went to raid the kitchen. </p>
<p>He jumped a little when his phone rang. He excused himself and stepped into the living room to answer it. </p>
<p>He stared at the screen when he saw who was calling. <em>Deacon</em>.</p>
<p>They drifted apart after Ted moved out since Captain Logan said it would be best to no longer have him around Deacon because he ‘set a bad example’. His brother called sometimes when his dad wasn’t home, but that meant talking only about once a month, and when they tried to reconnect after Deacon moved out things between them were awkward and stilted. Now they only saw each other during holidays, and sometimes Deacon would take Billie and Thea out to get ice cream or see a local baseball game. </p>
<p>"Hey, Deacon." </p>
<p>“Hey, big bro.” There was an awkward pause before he continued. “So, it’s Father’s Day.” </p>
<p>“Yeah, I know. Billie and Thea made us breakfast.” </p>
<p>“That’s cool. Uh, I know it’s a long shot, but I’m throwing dad a dinner and it would mean a lot to him if you showed up.” </p>
<p>Ted was silent. He hadn’t spoken to his dad in over ten years and Deacon was kidding himself if he thought Ted meant anything to Captain Logan. </p>
<p>“I know what you’re thinking, but it would be fun! You could bring Billie and Thea!” </p>
<p>Ted tightened his grip on the phone. Captain Logan only met them once, when they were one, and Ted was still pathetically attempting to build a bridge between himself and his dad. </p>
<p>Captain Logan scoffed at Billie and Thea’s names and made snide comments about every little parenting decision Bill and Ted made, ranging from bogus stuff like ‘you can’t put babies in Van Halen onesies’ to actually sound advice like ‘you have to put childproof locks on the cabinets’. The day ended after he insinuated that they wouldn’t amount to anything with Bill and Ted as their parents and Bill began cussing him out, which turned into a full-blown argument between the two that caused Ted to feel bad for the rest of the night despite nothing being his fault. </p>
<p>“I don’t know, Deacon.” It was really the only thing he could think of to say.</p>
<p>Ted really didn’t want to bring his kids anywhere near his dad. The last thing he wanted was for him to plant seeds of doubt in their heads, to make them feel lesser. If that meant Billie and Thea never meeting their grandpa, then that was fine. </p>
<p>He also knew they wouldn’t like the fancy restaurants his family often went to. </p>
<p>“You don’t have to come to the actual dinner!” Deacon kept pushing. “You could come by dad’s house after, or we could swing by your place.” </p>
<p>Billie and Thea entered then, flopping themselves down on the couch with a bag of Cheeto Puffs. Thea smiled at Ted as Billie turned on the t.v. and he gave her one back. </p>
<p>He knew he didn’t want to spend a second of today separated from them. Especially not for his dad. “I’m sorry, Deacon, but no,” Ted said into the phone. Deacon gave a simple okay and they both said bye before Ted hung up, going to join his kids on the couch just as Bill came in, stealing a Cheeto from the bag as he sat down beside Ted.</p>
<p>Billie flipped through channels before finally settling on Nickelodeon. Bill’s dad wandered in with a beer and sat in the chair next to the couch, chipping in every now and then to tell Billie and Thea embarrassing stories from Bill’s childhood. </p>
<p>Ted cozied himself down on the couch and Bill wrapped an arm around his shoulders. </p>
<p>There was guilt working its way into his chest, telling him he should have gone to that dinner. He could practically hear his dad’s voice in his head telling him he was a good for nothing son. </p>
<p>Ted pushed it away as best he could. He was a good husband and father, and there were people in his life that loved him, he didn’t need to worry about his dad anymore. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They all returned home about an hour ago, and now Thea and Billie were listening to music in their room while Bill and Ted tried writing a new song in the kitchen. </p>
<p>“How is writing in the kitchen supposed to help us?” Ted was doodling on the paper, trying to come up with lyrics. </p>
<p>“Brain food, dude.” </p>
<p>“Oh, right.” </p>
<p>Ted’s phone started ringing and he checked to see that Deacon was calling. </p>
<p>“What is it?” Bill saw the worry etched on Ted’s face. </p>
<p>“Nothing, it’s just Deacon calling again,” Ted told Bill earlier about the dinner invite. He answered. “Hello?” </p>
<p>“Ted, dad just left the restaurant and he said he’s going over to your place. I don’t know why but I thought I should give you a heads up!” Deacon was talking really fast, but Ted got the gist of it. He felt his blood go cold. "I think he really wanted you to come that dinner or something."</p>
<p>Ted hung up without saying goodbye, which he would apologize to Deacon for later. Bill’s brow furrowed and he asked what was wrong. </p>
<p>“My dad is coming over,” Ted said. “Deacon didn’t know why.” </p>
<p>“Don’t worry about it, Ted,” Bill got up and wrapped his arms around him. “I can tell him to leave when he gets here.” </p>
<p>Ted leaned into Bill. “No, Bill, I think I should talk to him.” </p>
<p>“You sure, dude?” Bill gave Ted a small kiss on the cheek. </p>
<p>“Yeah, dude.” </p>
<p>“Just remember, babe, you don’t owe your dad anything. Not even that heinous dinner.” </p>
<p>“I know,” Ted brought his lips to Bill’s, letting the soft fuzzy feeling of being with Bill push off his anxiety just a bit. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ted sat in the garage, pacing around until his dad pulled in. He stiffened, reverting to the fear he had when he was a teen. His dad didn't look too happy, but then again he never did. </p>
<p>"Ted," Captain Logan walked into the garage, looking around with a disapproving stare. "Aren't you going to invite me in?" </p>
<p>Ted sucked in a breath. The last time they talked, Bill had been the one to kick him out. It was always Bill, and while Ted appreciated it, it was time for him to stand up for himself. </p>
<p>"No," Ted said, trying not to apologize once his dad's eyes started shooting daggers. "This is the last time we'll be talking." </p>
<p>Captain Logan scoffed. "So I don't get to see my grandkids because I yelled at you a few times when you were a kid?" </p>
<p>A few times was a severe understatement. Ted knew they wouldn't get anywhere if he argued back, his father was an immovable object, and getting in a fight would only make Ted feel bad, so he ignored it. Although later he was definitely gonna rant to Bill about what a bogus statement that was. </p>
<p>Ted didn't get to say anything before Captain Logan continued. "Whatever, Ted. I only came by to give you this, and then you can go on doing whatever it is you do all day." </p>
<p>He reached to his back pocket and pulled out a cassette. Ted took it and suddenly felt like he was dreaming. </p>
<p>His second Bill mixtape. A heart to dot the i. </p>
<p>"You held onto it?" Ted couldn't take his eyes off it. It was surreal to be holding it in his hands again after so many years. He was scared if he dropped it it would cease to exist, only a figment of his imagination.</p>
<p>His dad sighed. There was no way he understood what his son was feeling, only seeing a grown man cling onto a tape like a child with a favorite toy. "I was going through my room and found it. It's pointless for me to have." </p>
<p>Ted finally looked up. It was the first time his dad actually did something <em>nice</em> for him. "Thanks, dad." </p>
<p>Captain Logan only rolled his eyes. "Your kids are doing well?" </p>
<p>"They're great." </p>
<p>"And you and Bill?" </p>
<p>"We're great, too." </p>
<p>"Okay well, bye, Ted." </p>
<p>"Bye, dad." </p>
<p>Captain Logan got back into his car, and Ted felt weird as he drove off. He expected a huge blowout or argument, a small part of him wanted there to be a dramatic apology so they could finally get along.</p>
<p>He wished that when he said bye, it felt like it, and all the bad feelings his dad gave him dissipated away. He didn't like the guilt he felt, how maybe he should have let him in. But Bill was right, he didn't owe him anything, and Ted reminded himself of that. </p>
<p>Ted read the cassette label over and over. </p>
<p>He had found out that Bill had his own Ted tape only a few days after they officially started dating, and Ted showed him his third tape in response. He never mentioned his second tape, though. It felt pointless to share something that was long gone, something that he assumed he would never see again. </p>
<p>They kept the tapes. They were sitting in the drawer in their nightstand.  </p>
<p>Ted went into the house, where Bill was leaning against the wall waiting for him. “How’d it go?” </p>
<p>Ted didn’t say anything. He threw himself at Bill, throwing his arms around him and breathing him in. Bill hugged him back, running his hands through his hair. “You okay?” </p>
<p>Ted pulled back and showed Bill his mixtape. “I gotta show you and Billie and Thea this.” </p>
<p>They all gathered in the living room. Ted put the tape in their boombox and explained the whole backstory while they listened.</p>
<p>Ted still wished things were better with his dad, but he didn’t need him. He had his own family, who loved him for who he was, and he was happy. </p>
<p>Really, really happy.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I had a lot of fun writing this story and I'm glad people enjoyed reading it! all the comments and kudos are appreciated and sorry I gave up on giving the chapters theme songs halfway through lmaoo</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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